New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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