When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize