.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
