YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
