Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
