Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?

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(214): View more from Texas

You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song

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(707): View more from California

Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....

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(250): View more from British Columbia

When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?

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(315): View more from New York

Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.

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(630): View more from Illinois

I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.

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