Need sex. Gaining weight.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
