i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
