i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
We left the knife in your bed.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Randomize
