Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
