I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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