Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
