Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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