it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
