Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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