fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
