wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize