Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Randomize