can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
