Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize