NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
