Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
