i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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