my mouth tastes like poor choices
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Randomize
