I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Hippo gnu deer
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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