i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
