he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Randomize
