I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
it's like heaven, but drunker
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
