I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
