What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Randomize
