I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
