so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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