fuck your aforementioned shoe
of course. lets lasso hookers.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
