I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
