Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
