I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize
