i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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