So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
My breasts were aching with rage.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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