We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Randomize
