I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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