She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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