He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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