I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
