So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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