remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
