That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
