Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
