Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
