I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
