i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
