I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize